Laugh A While – Santa the Great

 

*** In Office ***

 

He was sitting in his office on the thirteenth floor building when a man came running in to his office and shouted, "Santa, your daughter just met with an accident"

He got panicky. Not knowing what to do, he jumped from his office window.

While falling down when he was near the tenth floor he remembered he didn't have a daughter. When he was near the fifth floor he remembered that he was not even married. Meantime kept falling.

When he was about to hit the ground he remembered that his name was not Santa.

 

Santa On A Walk

 

Santa  was walking along, when he looked up to observe a bird flying overhead. Suddenly, the bird dropped a load when it was directly over him.

Santa said, "Good thing that cows don't fly."

 

Waiter

Santa went to eat in ramshackle hotel. To his surprise the waiter who came to serve him happened to be one of his classmate at school. Santa called him and said 'Aren't you ashamed of working in a seedy joint like this?'

 'Not at all,' replied the classmate. 'I would be ashamed if I ate my meal here. I only work in this place.'

 

Son

 

'Take me to the 10th floor,' said Santa as he entered the lift of a high raise building. When the lift reached its destination, the liftman opened its gates and said, 'The 10th floor, son.'

'Why did you call me son?' demanded Santa. 'I am not your son.' 'I called you beta because I brought you up,' replied the liftman.

 

 Ticket Collector

The collector asked Santa for his rail ticket. Santa searched his pockets but could not find it. 'Never mind,' reassured the collector, ' I will take your word that you bought your ticket.'

'That is very kind of you,' replied Santa, 'but if I don't find it, I want to know where to get off.'

 

Empty and Full Disks

Santa and a friend work in a software company. One day, they were to move their computers to another building. Santa was having a tough time carrying his computer.

The friend asked, “Any problem?”
Santa: "Your computer is newer and has very little data. My computer is an year old, it has plenty of data, and so it is much heavier”.

Marathon Race

One day Santa happened to see a marathon race.
"What are all these guys doing" asked Santa.
"We are running a marathon. The winner will get prize" replied one runner.
"Only the winner will get prize! Then why are others running?!!"

 

Suspense

 

Santa was very fond of sensational and detective novels, but he always started reading from the middle. A friend of his asked why he did so?"
It's doubly interesting", said Santa, To start from the middle; keeps one curious not only about its conclusion but also about its beginning.

 

Adopted Child

 

One day Santa was talking with a friend. We have to learn Telugu within 6 months or we will not be able to communicate with my child. Friend enquired ”Why Is it?

Santa replied “We have adopted a newly born Telugu child and he will start to speak after 6 months”.

 

Flag Pole Height

 Santa had an assignment to measure the height of a flagpole.

So he went out to the flagpole with ladder and tape measure, but kept falling off the ladder, dropping the tape measure - the whole thing was just a mess.

A passer-by came along and saw what Santa was trying to do. He walked over, pulls the flagpole out of the ground, lays it flat, measures it from end to end, gives the measurement to Santa and walks away.

After the person has gone, Santa turned and laughed. "What a nut, I am looking for the height and he gives us the length."